The Importance of Social Strength Now

Paul von Zielbauer
Thu, 29 Jan 2026 20:06:08 -0800
Lifestyle

It's time to talk about social strength. It's one of the most important, but least discussed pillars of healthy aging. Social strength traditionally refers to the need for anyone in the second half of life to cultivate healthy connections to the visceral outside world — people, organizations and, not least, nature.

Mattering to others, and having others matter to us, is essential to aging with strength. The problem is that most days, it's easy to put off thinking about mattering another day, another month. Mattering will matter soon enough, goes this line of thinking, but right now I'm busy.

Unfortunately, given what's happening in this country right now — in Minneapolis, in Georgia and of course in our nation's capital, among other places — this critical notion of aging with great social strength, of mattering to others and having others matter to us, can't wait another day, another month.
Updated: Thu Jan 29, 2026

It's time to talk about social strength. It's one of the most important, but least discussed pillars of healthy aging. Social strength traditionally refers to the need for anyone in the second half of life to cultivate healthy connections to the visceral outside world — people, organizations and, not least, nature.

Mattering to others, and having others matter to us, is essential to aging with strength. The problem is that most days, it's easy to put off thinking about mattering another day, another month. Mattering will matter soon enough, goes this line of thinking, but right now I'm busy.

Unfortunately, given what's happening in this country right now — in Minneapolis, in Georgia and of course in our nation's capital, among other places — this critical notion of aging with great social strength, of mattering to others and having others matter to us, can't wait another day, another month.

This is not a political argument but rather a somber observation about what is happening to our neighbors and ourselves, on our residential streets and in our halls of government. Masked, anonymous federal agents in Minnesota are shooting people who weren't posing a lethal threat — without apparent repercussions. An FBI raid on Georgia state election offices, confiscating sensitive voter information. The stunning boldness of top elected and appointed officials in Washington, lying to our faces and expecting us to accept their lies.

Do I sound political? I get it. I have a point of view and am expressing it. But you have one, too, and should also express it, civilly, regardless of how similar or different it may be from mine, your spouse's, your family's or your favorite cable news channel's. That's social strength, and we need more of it right now, even if many of us will never agree on most things.

Social strength is about speaking up loudly but civilly for what you believe is right — whatever side of the many, many arguments, burning like smoke grenades, you choose to take.

The masked government killing, the smug official lying, the obsession with the idiotic idea that a presidential election was stolen — it's too much to ignore now.

This week, one friend told me she and her colleagues are so upset and angry that they can't concentrate. Another friend told me he doesn't want to know what's going on, doesn't follow any news at all because he can't change anything, anyway, so there's no point.

I completely understand each of these folks because I'm basically both of their emotions rolled into one: Stunned disbelief and outrage mixed with a notion of utter helplessness. Because what, I'm supposed to quit my job to stand on a corner holding a sign?

Protesting with other people is a fine example of building social strength, if that's what helps you feel more connected, more mattered, to the bewildering world you now live in. But it's not the only way to build your social strength.

My argument here is that connecting to other people, regardless of their beliefs and backgrounds, is important. Most of us live too much in bubbles of our own making. We all know what happens to every bubble that has ever existed.

So we need a line out to the wider world right now. Express your rage, anger, sadness — at whatever is making you feel that way. Be vocal. Be firm. But also be courteous to those who disagree with you. Especially if they're armed federal agents who believe they have the right to violate your constitutional rights to build social strength peacefully.

Throw away all the contemporaneous elements of this column, and you still have a point of view worth thinking about:

You don't want to be someone who's become more comfortable eating meals in front of a giant TV screen than spending an hour or three with other humans, or in the woods, a lake or an ocean. I say that as someone who has lone wolf tendencies and can, to the dismay of some people in life, spend an awful lot of time happily by myself.

I'm just finding that tendency less appealing at a time when the country I grew up in now feels like a society I don't recognize anymore.