Dear Readers: After my column in response to "Worried Daughter," who was concerned that her widowed mother was becoming increasingly isolated and dependent two years after her husband's death, readers wrote with thoughtful suggestions. Thank you to all, but especially to two readers for sharing your personal and professional experiences with the same situation.

Dear Annie: As a retired LCSW who spent the last 30 years of my practice focusing on grief and loss, I'd like to offer another perspective.

This mother may need her daughter's support in finding a grief counselor. The early years of grief can leave someone extraordinarily vulnerable, and individual counseling can provide the attention and guidance she may need.

After losing a spouse, a person is not only grieving someone deeply loved but may also be struggling to discover who she is on her own. She needs compassion and support as she mourns that profound loss and begins learning how to take charge of her own life again. A grief support group might also be helpful, perhaps in addition to individual counseling.

I experienced the death of my own dear husband at age 72. Even as an assertive and independent person, I found the adjustment enormously difficult.

Professional grief counseling is an important and sometimes overlooked resource. Her physician may be able to provide a referral, and local hospice organizations often have information about grief support services.

Blessings to you in your work. We all need to support one another as we find our way toward a meaningful life. — A Retired Social Worker Who Understands Grief

Dear Annie: Your response to the daughter whose mother was still deeply grieving, isolated and increasingly dependent after two years made several good points, but I would add one more possibility.

Her mother might be experiencing Prolonged Grief Disorder, or PGD, which is recognized in the DSM-5-TR. When grief remains intensely painful and significantly interferes with a person's ability to function well beyond the first year following a loss, it may be worth seeking an evaluation from a mental health professional experienced in grief and bereavement.

Not everyone who continues grieving deeply has PGD, of course. Grief has no simple timetable. But when someone seems to be becoming more debilitated rather than gradually adjusting to life after the loss, professional evaluation may be an important next step. — Another Reader Who Cares

Dear Annie: My husband and I have been married 22 years, and lately I feel more like his roommate than his wife. After dinner, he disappears into his phone while I watch TV or finish chores. We rarely argue, but we rarely laugh together anymore, either. When I suggest a date night, he says, "Sure, sometime," but sometime never seems to come. I love him, but I miss us. Is this simply what happens after years of marriage? — Missing My Husband

Dear Missing: Long marriages can become comfortable, but comfort shouldn't turn into distance. Don't wait for "sometime." Pick a night and make a plan. Most importantly, tell him gently that you miss him. Romance changes over the years, but connection still needs attention.

"Out of Bounds: Estrangement, Boundaries and the Search for Forgiveness" is out now! Annie Lane's third anthology is for anyone who has lived with anger, estrangement or the deep ache of being wronged — because forgiveness isn't for them. It's for you. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Follow Annie Lane on Instagram at @dearannieofficial. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

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